In the past two years we've weaned James off his g-tube and begun making almost everything in our own kitchen. I've struggled with horribly painful facial blemishes and chronic fatigue, seen a nutritional therapy practitioner, drastically changed my diet, quickly fixed the facial blemishes and fatigue, struggled with maintaining the dietary change, had another child, and struggled with fatigue again. We recently found out that our entire family has Lyme's disease. I've felt increasingly worse over the past few months and I've progressively taken more and more foods out of my diet. I am making my way toward the auto immune paleo diet and my digestive track is thanking me. But, the joy I used to find in food is gone.
Food has always been my release. It is that friend I looked forward to seeing throughout the day. In high school I loved waking up at the crack of dawn and eating my eggo waffle with peanut butter and fake syrup. And we always had family dessert time at night, I think those are some of my fondest memories with my family. It was the perfect closure to the day.
I have always been an emotional eater so it is difficult to deal with such a drastic dietary change sans some form of comfort. I broke down last night and made paleo cookies (they would have been aip if not for the chocolate). Baking is comforting in itself, but sitting down to enjoy a warm chocolate chip cookie on a Fall evening is just amazing. I ended up eating a little too much in the baking process and my stomach got pretty mad, keeping me up off and on throughout the night. I am still learning. I am learning that food isn't the right release. I am training my body to not want the foods that will make me sick. The bakery aisle in the grocery store looks very unappetizing (usually). My homemade treats, however, are a dangerously different story. I bake mostly with coconut and tapioca flour, but I need to limit those as well because they are high FODMAP foods which can cause bloating and digestive distress, something I also struggle with. I have come to realize that I should not eat even AIP-friendly baked goods on a daily basis. I have to come to terms with the fact that my eating habits will consist almost entirely of whole foods.
As a I deal with these changes I hope that my body will heal to the point that I can transition into traditional eating. The Weston A. Price Foundation has great information on traditional (what I like to consider "vintage") preparation and cooking. My sourdough culture is sitting in the closet waiting for me to get healthy enough to start some Einkorn flour sourdough bread. That is the dream. But right now I need to focus on a healing diet so that, one day, maybe years from now, hopefully sooner, I can, once again, eat a slice of my homemade bread fresh from the oven.
I've always loved vintage things, I hope I can come to love vintage cooking.
I have always been an emotional eater so it is difficult to deal with such a drastic dietary change sans some form of comfort. I broke down last night and made paleo cookies (they would have been aip if not for the chocolate). Baking is comforting in itself, but sitting down to enjoy a warm chocolate chip cookie on a Fall evening is just amazing. I ended up eating a little too much in the baking process and my stomach got pretty mad, keeping me up off and on throughout the night. I am still learning. I am learning that food isn't the right release. I am training my body to not want the foods that will make me sick. The bakery aisle in the grocery store looks very unappetizing (usually). My homemade treats, however, are a dangerously different story. I bake mostly with coconut and tapioca flour, but I need to limit those as well because they are high FODMAP foods which can cause bloating and digestive distress, something I also struggle with. I have come to realize that I should not eat even AIP-friendly baked goods on a daily basis. I have to come to terms with the fact that my eating habits will consist almost entirely of whole foods.
As a I deal with these changes I hope that my body will heal to the point that I can transition into traditional eating. The Weston A. Price Foundation has great information on traditional (what I like to consider "vintage") preparation and cooking. My sourdough culture is sitting in the closet waiting for me to get healthy enough to start some Einkorn flour sourdough bread. That is the dream. But right now I need to focus on a healing diet so that, one day, maybe years from now, hopefully sooner, I can, once again, eat a slice of my homemade bread fresh from the oven.
I've always loved vintage things, I hope I can come to love vintage cooking.
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